


Happy Deathday, Oracle!

by EndbossEmpress



Category: Original Work
Genre: Assassination, Prophecy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-13 05:39:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17482247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndbossEmpress/pseuds/EndbossEmpress
Summary: In a land once ravaged by Artificial Gods, dark forces move to eliminate the one person who knows how to destroy their threat forever...Too bad they're trying to murder someone who can see the future.





	Happy Deathday, Oracle!

The Oracle awoke one sunny Spring morning the same way she did every sunny Spring morning. She spent roughly ten more minutes trying to will herself back asleep, gave it up as a bad job and sat up, then plucked her Scrying Tablet off her bedside table to review her schedule. What was unlike every sunny Spring morning was the fact that she did not typically have "6 PM: Write dire, cryptic warning, then get assassinated" at the end of her to-do list.

But when you can flawlessly predict the future, your to-do lists look pretty weird no matter what. Shaking her head a bit, she stood and made her way to the bathroom. Really, just because this was the day she died was no excuse to look like she just rolled out of bed. And besides, baths always helped her collect her thoughts.

Lying there in the hot water, idly scrubbing at one of her hooves, she reflected on the day ahead of her. It seemed like only yesterday that news had reached her of Vulcan's demise. An ingenious method of doing it, really. A machine, created over decades of backbreaking labor, whose functions worked in such a way to be completely, utterly useless.

It was no wonder an ingelligent, but not wise AI with an obssession with meanings would go and brick itself trying to understand the point of it. The first Artificial God to be slain in the cycle... which meant things were going to get very complicated soon. Forces that would prefer the Artificial Gods to win would be getting very nervous. They knew there was one more Artificial God skulking around under humanity's nose, and if they could kill one, they could kill any of them.

So, why not dispose of the one woman who could tell everyone how to find and kill that final, undetected God?

And that was why she was going to die. Because foolish, evil people had a bad habit of thinking they could defy fate just by stabbing enough backs and poisoning enough drinks. And while they were wrong, that didn't change the fact that at 6:10, she would be shot in the heart by an unknown assailant shortly after concealing a warning about Saturn, the Artificial God of Knowledge and the only one that remained uncaptured, within her chambers to be found by the authorities.

The Oracle sighed, and began to drain the now rather cool water, drying herself off and donning her far too elaborate Oracle garments. Much as she hated the flowing gowns and garish crown (much as it accentuated her antlers nicely), she needed to look sufficiently intimidating and official today, when she warned the masses about the final Artificial God in their midst.

After all, she needed to goad her murderer into action somehow...

\-----------------------

Somehow, in defiance of all expectations, the final day of her life seemed to crawl by with agonizing slowness. She'd always assumed such a day would be over in an instant, those last moments of life slipping through her fingers like sand in an hourglass, her end coming so swiftly she scarcely realized.

But instead, it seemed she had all the time in the world to contemplate her imminent demise. Between her theatrical announcement that she had "divined the presence of a traitor in our midst" and "feeling the presence of a final Artificial God", followed by hours of frantic questioning by every Lord and authority figure who could show up on her doorstep, it all seemed to go slowly enough that she could be distracted by the fact she would die that night.

Everyone seemed to notice, of course, but to her relief, nobody seemed too intent on questioning it, perhaps chalking it up to the stress of her powers or attempts to interpret hazy visions of what was coming. Of course, her powers were neither stressful on her body or difficult to interpret, but she'd cultivated such an image very carefully.

At 5 PM, she wished a solemn farewell to her final visitor, and declared she would retire to her chambers to interpret her visions further. She noticed full well when a figure in the crowd slipped away while she spoke.

At 5:15, she took a while to try and determine which outfit she owned was her least favorite. The last thing she needed was to literally be caught dead in an outfit she couldn't stand.

At 5:30, she finally chose her least favorite outfit, and carefully set it aside with a note that it should be given to someone who could use it. Just because she didn't want it didn't mean someone else wouldn't.

At 5:45, she sat down at her desk and began writing. She knew full well just who Saturn "was", and how to destroy them. But she didn't know, specifically, who or what they were disguised as, or what they were doing. She tried to think of the most theatrical, ominous way of phrasing it.

At 6:00 PM, she decided it wasn't really worth it, considering the time limit she was under. She decided, just this once, to make it simple. They'd thank her, really.

At 6:09, she placed her final prophecy in a place she knew the assassin would never think to look, then made sure her outfit was straightened properly. There was a sharp knock on her door.

At 6:10, she stood before the door, reached for the handle... then hesitated. Then she stepped exactly two inches to the right. There. Now the bullet would at least kill her instantly.

47 seconds after 6:10, The Oracle opened her front door, looked into a pair of familiar eyes, and died.

\--------------------------

15 hours after The Oracle's death, a curious law enforcement officer discovered a loose brick in the back of her fireplace. A bit of prying and jimmying revealed a hidden alcove, with an immaculately folded note concealed within...

"Saturn walks among us, in the shape of a mortal. So too will they will die like a mortal.

The hard part is going to be catching them."


End file.
